I’m about to get real with you guys. I’ve talked to you a little bit about how I used to do things “halfway,” and how I was kind of good at a lot of things, but never really excelled in one area.
I know I’m not the only person out there that feels like that, right?
Well, I want to tell you that I have been able to pin point that mentality down to one thing and my hope is that my story will reveal some truth for yourself.
“I can’t” was my slogan, tag line, theme song, jam, whatever you want to call it, I played it on repeat. And I was great at manifesting that reality for myself.
While living with the mantra of I can’t, I was an expert in tip toeing past the things that scared me or made me even consider stepping outside of my comfort zone. I Can’t was my security blanket, and it kept me safe from failure. Or at least that’s what I thought.
If I said I can’t, then that meant I didn’t have to try, and if I didn’t try then I couldn’t fail. But holy cow, what an injustice I was doing for myself, what an injustice I was doing for the world! Maybe that sounds drastic, the world? But it’s not!
I believe we all are born with a power within ourselves and we’re meant to create and share that power for the highest good. If I’m able to impact one person from my blog, I’m having an impact on the world. I think sometimes we get overwhelmed with feeling like we have to help huge masses of people all at once and if we don’t, well then, we simply aren’t contributing. I’m here to tell you that’s a lie. It’s a lie that our fear speaks to us. It’s a lie that holds us back from reaching the truth that we so much desire to experience.
Start Searching For Your Truth
Once you begin to seek that truth that lies within yourself, your old, fear induced mantras will be exposed. For me, this meant starting from the beginning. I had this gut feeling that I was meant to do more than work at my boring 9-5 job, but I wasn’t sure how or what that was. So I began learning about myself (which I had ignored for a long time). I started to read and become curious about what I valued and wanted out of this life, and what I was called to do.
Early in my personal development quest, I read something that changed me. It exposed my fear induced mantra of I Can’t.
“The only person that can be called a failure is that person who tries to succeed at nothing. Success, as far as a person is concerned, does not lie in achievement, it lies in striving, reaching, and attempting.” – Earl Nightengale
These words exposed my truth. In my fear of not being able to achieve; I didn’t even try. And for that reason, failure was already my reality, which is what I was trying to avoid in the first place.
This changed everything for me. It forced me to begin asking How Can I? Instead of I can’t. It made me start striving, reaching, and attempting, one small baby step at a time, while knowing there was no way I could fail if I were learning. This was an incredible AHA moment that guided me to adopt a new mantra.
Create a new mantra
What is your biggest fear based mantra that plays on repeat?
- I can’t
- It’s too hard
- I’m not smart enough
- I can’t make decisions
There’s a lot out there to choose from!
What could you replace it with?
For me it was changing I can’t, to How Can I? It seems like SUCH a small change, but its effects were unbelievably powerful. I had NO idea how to start a blog, WordPress was like a foreign language to me, and my spelling abilities, well we won’t go there! All of these things brought forth my mantra of I can’t.
But this time it was different.
When I heard I can’t, I recognized it, and I replaced it with, How Can I? I began to ask myself, How Can I create this blog? And you know what, I figured it out! That’s not to say it was easy, there were times I felt like giving up, but I kept asking, How Can I? It was my new song on repeat, and I was slowing starting to live it out.
What if we used this mantra for any area of our life that challenged us? Maybe you want to lose weight and start of the path of living healthy; perhaps you desire a career change, or you’re thinking about starting a business. Ask yourself, How Can I? I love Marie Forleo’s talk on “Everything is figureoutable.” I highly recommend listening to it! She gives a beautiful talk about how everything in life figureoutable, even the most challenging things you face, there’s always a way to figure it out.
How Can I?
I live by this mantra now, and, it’s the reason I am at this moment right here, exactly where I need to be. And guys don’t think that I have this thing completely figured out yet. Right now I’m facing resistance as I move forward with my blog. I want to start shooting some videos, and my old mantra of I can’t is still whispering in my ear, it’s my fear. And the truth is, that fear is always going to be there, I just have to make my new mantra of How Can I louder, and know that it’s figureoutable. It takes practice, it’s a daily exercise, and with time it will strengthen.
That’s my biggest tip for you today. Our old fear based mantras are always going to be here, and the secret to getting past them is to live by new mantras, play them on repeat, and manifest their truth. That is where we will find enormous growth and change in ourselves.
Thank you guys for reading this. My prayer is that you identify your fear based mantra and replace it. It’s one small step, and it’s leading you to something wonderful.
I would love to hear if any of you have traded in any fear mantras, and what you replaced them with?